House Tour!

Wow. It's been a while, huh? I'm not a very good blogger, am I?

Well, I'm going to try and make it up to you with this adorable little Cape cottage. I know we've already covered the fact that I don't show you anything bigger or more fabulous, but I like the cottagey-type houses. It's my way.

So. This one has a back yard that runs right into my Alma Mater, The College of St. Catherine: the bestest place in the world.

Anyhoo.....while it's on a busy street? It's a great location. The price is a bit steep. $400-something thousand. I'd love to tell you exactly, but you see, I started this post on the weekend and since then, the house has been removed from the website.

Dammit.

But it's been for sale forever. The real sadness is that I have a link to the website at the end of this post where they had many more fabulous photos of this house. Especially the back of the house with a stone deck and pergola. Which is what I want here at Elizabeth-freakin'-Hill. But since I never printed out a picture, how will I remember??? Huh??? Answer me that!! Oh. And the link probably won't work, either. But I'm leaving it in there....just in case.

Alright. Here is the adorable outside. I can't remember how many bedrooms and bathrooms. Probably 4 beds and 2 baths....something like that.
Oooooo! An aerial view. Special!

Sweet-Mary-Mother-Of-God. Look at that adorable sun room, will ya?

The dining room.

The living room. I love how you can look straight through to the back of the house through the sun room.

The sweet little kitchen. Hello?? Where is the dishwasher?? Hellooooo??? Dishwasher? Humph.

SweetJESUS! Look at that adorable bathroom!!!! Elizabeth Hill had plans all drawn out for one just like it. The problem is, the plumbing wouldn't have worked out and the plans were drawn by the previous owners who didn't know what the heck they were doing. So? No bathroom upstairs.

So that's it. Cute, right?

And here's that precarious link I was telling you about:

To see the rest of the photos, go here.

Next time? We will discuss my furniture painting situation. It's not pretty, people. Not pretty at all.

xoxox,

martha

The Champions.......

Noodle and I started the ol'-pick-the-name-out-of-a-hat thing.....but I made her stop.

Because I while I loved all of the stories and didn't want to pick between them because I didn't want to be the bad guy?......................I really loved Blueberry's story of holding some unknown guy's hand, thinking it was her hubby's. I couldn't get it out of my head, which told me it was probably one of my very favorites. Plus, it was kinda sweet and dorky, right? Not that Blueberry is dorky. And if she is a little dorky (like myself)?? She is going to be a dork with a nice, strong core from exercising with her new personal trainer Kim!!!! Woo Hoo!!!!

And the other winner?? Amy was right: It's Sarah.

I think she needs to win a little somethin'-somethin' for getting out there and making a complete disaster out of a simple morning stalking-session.

Plus? It's her birthday today!!! Happy birthday Sarah! You will be celebrating with some nice, strong triceps!

Thanks for playing everyone! I absolutely LOVED these stories! I think I'm going to have to do another DVD give-away soon.....I wanted you ALL to win.

Love to you all!

Martha

AND THE WINNERS ARE..............

going to be picked later. When my camera battery is all charged up.

You see, I wore out the battery taking pictures on my Mc Hottie ride-along.

I will say this: I did already pick one winner. I'm not sayin' who it is yet. But I will tell you this: Zuddy and I both picked this one because of it's cringe-worthiness and also because it's totally something that would happen to me. Cause I never do something embarrassing on a small scale...nope.

All of the other participants are going into a container for the Noodle to pick the 2nd winner. Those were some fine stories, ladies.

Let's do a little rundown on the stories, shall we?

1. Sue: A friend of hers demurely excused herself from church service (in a HUGE church) to ummmm.....attend to her bathroom needs. Came back to her seat with her skirt unknowingly tucked into her granny panties.
2. Lisa: Her sweet son POWER PUKED all over dinner at a Chinese restaurant. The word "faucet mouth"? Highlight of the story for me :)
3. Sarah: Doing a driveby-stalking of her boyfriend....crashes into an elderly German couple's car while trying to stalk. Totals her Mom's brand new car.
4. Blueberry: having a sophisticated date with hubby at the symphony. Browsing in the gift shop during intermission and when it's time to go back to her seat she grabs hub's hand to head back.......only it's not HUB'S HAND!!!!! She has another story, but I love this one the best.
5. Jen: Got stuck trying on a shirt at the Gap. The shirt had to be destroyed in the removal process. Heh. Love it.
6. Cutz: She's not in the contest to win the prize, so I'm leaving her out of the drawing, but suffice it to say that she can't seem to keep track of her panties while on vacation. Heh.
7. Linda: She has three stories, but here's my favorite: In the video store with 3 kids. One of the boys does a silent but deadly emission. She gets blamed LOUDLY by the other son.
8. Kim: 2 stories: Her panties with the faulty elastic fall down in the lobby of her work!! Also, while Blueberry was holding some guys hand that wasn't her hubby? Kim takes this situation a step further and gooses a guy who isn't Glenn, her hubby! Ha!
9. D'Rae: Corporate Challenge games.....flashes all the higher-ups when falling legs-up during the tug-o-war. Okay, fine. She didn't actually say it was the higher-ups, did she? I'm extrapolating. Hey D'Rae? Did you get a promotion after that? :)
10. Amy: Schnockered on a male-filled boat ride in Lake Michigan. Had to pee. Hung off the boat's edge to do her business. Fell in the water and lost her shorts and unders. And apartment keys. Had to wear a towel the rest of the evening and hunt down her landlord all over Chicago for an extra set of keys. All without any pants on. I know Amy personally....and I've got to tell you: this is not at all unusual for her. HAAAAAAAaaaaa!!!!!

Great job Everyone!! Thanks so much for playing my game.

Okay - I'm going check on my battery now!

Wednesday Is The Day, People!

By the end of the day on Wednesday, I will be choosing 2 winners for that FAB-U dvd from your new personal trainer, Kim!

So keep those stories coming, people! Keep 'em comin'!

Really, though. I may have to pick the winners out of a hat. All of your stories are soooo good!

Who knew our friend Cutzi was such a Minx?? Huh??? Va-va-voooom!

Pam and Martha: Special Agents

Heh. What kind of special.......I don't know.

Dudes.

After this ride-along? I totally want to be a cop. But I don't think I have the multi-tasking skillz.

I'm not kidding. Cops are master multi-taskers.

But let's start at the beginning of this story:

Zuddy and I met at our 5 year high school reunion (See? Waaayyyy back at the beginning).

We got married 12 years ago while I was still in college. Instead of having a wedding? We bought our house. It's not the best neighborhood in St. Paul, but it's not the worst either. It was billed as one of the "up-and-coming" neighborhoods. Plus- it was all we could afford with me still in college.

About 7 years ago, Officer Mc Hott's Mom moved next door to us. We love her. He lived with her at the time. Now he has his own house in a neighboring suburb, but his beat is right here in our neighborhood - which is where he grew up. He works the 10:30 pm to 7:30 am shift.

Pam and Jeff moved next door to us 2 years ago. They are empty nesters who moved here from a very nice suburb. They wanted to live in the city. We love them. Every weekend we sit in lawn chairs in their driveway and talk their ears off. We will probably wake up one day to find they've moved out of their house in the middle of the night to get away from us.

I'm a block club leader and we've had a lot of problem properties in the last couple of years, so officer Mc Hott comes to our block club meetings to get the scoop. With his help, we've been able to force-out a major problem family. Please don't think we're meanies: I'm talking drug-dealing gang members with drive-by shootings. Serious stuff, people.

Anyway, officer McHott will stop by for a chat when he's at his Mom's house and tell us cop stories. We eat it up. Zuddy and I love a good cop story. He's been telling me for a year that he can take me on a ride-along so neighbor Pam and I finally took him up on it.

Here's how the night went:

I was worried I wouldn't be able to stay awake until 11pm when he was picking us up, so I took a big nap.

Then I met Pam in her garage at 10 pm:

I had my purse.

And I was dressed in actual clothes.

And I had make-up on.

And lip gloss.

Jeff.....who is Pam's hubby? Here he is....right here:

Jeff informed me that this ride-along was in fact NOT a date with officer McHott.

WHA???? Huh???

Really? It's not? It really IS just a ride-along??? Humph.

Pam assured me that, no. This evening was, in fact, NOT a date with officer McHott.

Whatever.

I ditched the purse but kept the gloss.

Officer McHott came by at about 11pm (right after roll-call) to pick us up. He and Zuddy talked shop for a little bit:

I know......I had the camera on some weird setting and it's blurry. Or?....... is Zuddy just trying to touch every button reallyquick before we leave? You be the judge.

Here is the fine officer showing Zuddy the stuff in the squad car.

Here's Pam and me. I'm laughing because I have 4 chins and don't realize it yet. When I downloaded these photos? The laughter abruptly stopped, oh yes it did:

I rode most of the time in the back seat, where the criminals ride. Coincidence? I think not.

We learned many important lessons on our ride-along:

1. No good happens after Midnight. Hell....no good happens after 9pm. All of the good people are in bed. Go to bed.

2. If you are out in the middle of the night on a Saturday night you are probably:

• Driving with a suspended license.
• Driving without a license.
• Drunk.
• Drunk and driving without a license.
• A hooker.
• A drunk hooker trying to pick up officer Mc Hott.

3. No matter which car you stumble upon or which license plate you punch into your computer, it WILL come up with something fishy about the car owner. This was a total surprise to me. The officer could've spent the whole night pulling people over because of some sort of previous violation. (See #1 and get to bed early on Saturday nights.)

4. If he pulled everyone over who deserved it, he wouldn't be available to take the really serious and dangerous calls. It's the sad, sad truth. He has to let a lot of "important" stuff go, because in the end? It's usually not that important.

5. My "normal" life? It's not the norm. It's boring, wholesome, honest, loving and sane. Who knew?

My New Personal Trainer, Kim.

Yep. I have a new Personal Trainer.

Her name is Kim.

Okay, fine.

I've never actually met her. But I feel like I have. Because I see her every day.

My sister Dawn just gave me her new DVD called Small Changes=Big Benefits. Dawn actually DOES know her - they've been friends for years. And Dawn's been using the DVD and has totally toned up.

Here's Kim's schtick: the fitness industry is a money-making business. Kim says it takes much less time and effort to get fit than everyone in the fitness industry is telling us. We can do it at home with a balance ball and one of those tube-thingies - no expensive gym membership required. (Unless you're talking Jazzercise - then by all means......There's this nice little studio in Washington State I've heard about....awesome owner. You should join that place. Even if you're out of state ;)

So Kim made this DVD with four 10-minute workout segments. You pick one of them a day PLUS the stretching segment and you're done. The workouts are uncomplicated, but challenging. I've been doing the Ball Strength workout and it's making me feel great. I actually look forward to it, even though I can't do a couple of the exercises very well....the tricep push-up is killer.

Here's Kim's other schtick: Quit feeling guilty. It's paralyzing and detrimental to your well-being. It makes you feel out of control, so stop it. And further more? Quit beating yourself up. No good comes of that. If you've messed up? Just. Move. On.

So.

There it is.

You know I'm trying to make changes in my life. I don't like the way I look. And it's all because of my lack of exercise. I feel guilty. I beat myself up because before I met Zuddy I was quite the exerciser. Every day. Without fail. And now? Not so much. And oddly enough? I don't even realize I beat myself up about it most of the time! I have so far to go to get back to where I want to be that it's just too much.

But guess what? I can do ten minutes of strength exercises from Kim's video and I feel GREAT. I can do it while Noodle is with me.....she loves to watch, give me a drink of water and cheer me on. Best of all, it just makes me feel good. I almost don't care about losing weight. I really just want to keep getting stronger.

So! I'm giving away 2 of her DVDs. Because I love it so freakin' much! It just makes me feel happy. I really think you will love it to - even if you're already fit. It makes you feel great.

Now.

What do you need to do for this contest? I'm not sure yet.

I'm trying to think of something entertaining.......something that will make us all feel good.

How about this:

Go into the comment section and share your most embarrassing moment. Or the funniest thing that's happened to you or a loved one lately. Maybe it's something your child said? You know - just something funny and entertaining.

The funniest TWO stories EACH win a DVD featuring your new trainer, Kim.

I'm hoping to have an entertaining moment or two myself tonight: Neighbor Pam and I are going on a ride-along with Officer McHott tonight. That means we will be riding along with him in his squad car while he's on patrol tonight. Do you ever remember me talking about Officer McHott? Total freakin' eye candy for Pam and me. I'll take pictures of the fine officer.

Have a great day, friends :)

SO Sorry......

Man.

I can't believe it's been so long since I've last posted! Our computer has been a little inaccessible lately....long story.

What have you all been up to? Huh? Pop into the comments and let me know, because I have some pretty serious catching up on my blog reading......and I owe everyone an email, it seems.

I've been working pretty much every Monday and Tuesday, which couldn't be more perfect, I must say.

Noodle is home for the summer and we went for a bike ride this morning. We rode our bikes to the tennis courts to sign up for summer tennis lessons and then stopped into Zuddy's workplace for a little visit since it's so close to the tennis courts.

Oh my gosh. I must stop now. This post is so FREAKING boring that I can't even bear to go on!!!!!!!! Good God. I'm even boring myself right now!!!!

I'll post something tomorrow. I swear.

AND....guess what? I'm going to have a GIVEAWAY !!!! YES! It's about time, right? I mean, my bloggiversary was way back in March, right? Sheesh!

I've just got to figure out what you all need to do to win this little prize. I will explain the prize tomorrow. I'm going to do a whole post on it. Because you are going to love it. I hope.
Because I love it.
And really.....it's all about me. Right? Heh. Just kidding. I really think you will like the prize.

Should I give you a little hint?

No?

Okay. I won't.

Tee Hee.