Tuesday, February 19, 2008

I have a bone to pick............

....with the guy who doused himself in this before getting on an elevator with me:


It's not okay to wear this cologne anymore.

It stinks.

And not in a good way. You know what the smell of this reminds me of?


A college house party ca. 1989. When I smell Polo cologne, I'm instantly brought back to a time in my life when I would party with sweaty drunken college boys. I don't just smell the cologne. I smell stale beer and bad breath mixed with that cologne. Then I think about Hawaiin shirts, jean shorts and big hair.

And the Politician shown at a frat party in the photo above?

A freakin' BONUS. Because when I googled "Frat Party Photo" this was the first entry to come up. How is it a good idea to attend a frat party if you're a politician? I smell another Lewinsky scandal coming on......

Dude. Politicans skeeve me out. Icky. Perhaps when one is elected into public service? There should be moral compass attached to the explanation of benefits folder.

Just a suggestion.

30 comments:

Janelle said...

Sometimes I look at people on TV and wonder what they smell like in person--and I especially do this with politicians! I wonder if Dubya smells like Polo...

Anonymous said...

HA! That is EXACTLY what I think of when I smell Polo cologne!!! Frat parties circa early 90s. Wow, there are some memories....

Sister Honey Bunch/Judi maloney said...

Polo cologne makes me think of making out with boys. ~sigh~

Brooke said...

They still make that crap?

Ahhh the frat house...beer, sweat, urine and Polo! Good times, good times I tell you! I don't "remember" any politicians at the frat parties!?!

Penny said...

I agree Polo is some nasty stuff. ICK!

Mrs. Jones said...

He looks all sweat and polo-smellin', too. Yuck!

Polo actually reminds me of my first boyfriend. aaaaawwwwww. He was so cute, but I bet now he is a short, bald little polo-wearin' man.

Martha said...

Oh Janelle - you KNOW Dubya smells like Polo! Clinton, too. Bill, that is.
And did you guys see the sweaty party goer in the turquoise shirt?
He's wearing it. You just know it.

forcryeye said...

What a hoot. Polo reminds me of...my Dad...I think he may still wear it, but I think he was "grandfathered" in...pun intended. The only politician I ever had faith in was Paul Wellstone (RIP)...I was at his victory party. I am making some plans to take the glasses on a tour...I am sure you would look HOT in them!

SeaWorthy said...

Well, I have to say, (because I know you all have been waiting for my comment) that Polo was a near and dear part of my life, many moons ago, THEN the relationship went wrong, very wrong, in fact- so wrong that still, to this day, cannot even remotely think of that smell or I get sick to my stomach. I bet that rotten bastard still wears it, is still a psychopath, and still has a pair of my underwear, somewhere. GROSS!!!

So funny how a smell can take you back, eh?
Lisa
coastal nest

SeaWorthy said...

NOw I have a belly ache, thanks martha..

Elle Jay Bee said...

Sorry, I'm with Sister Honey Bunch...Polo brings back GOOD memories for me. In fact, I bought hubby a bottle a couple of years ago...you know, for old times sake...

Don't worry, he never really wears it!

Linda

Lisa said...

Polo = memories! Just like Loves Baby Soft.

Queen B said...

That is so funny. Ah, Polo. Takes me right back to junior high.

There is nothing worse than smelling it on a grown man. And they can't just dab it on...

Anonymous said...

I love this post...even though we are scattered around the country we all have similar memories of Polo!

Anonymous said...

Polo, maybe. But the real gut punch for me is Drakkar Noir. It drags me back to that boyfriend my freshman year of college that my mom hated. I dated him anyway and it turned out Mom was right. Double ick whammy! Meh--mrees (I'm singing now.)

MJ

Debra said...

I didn't know they still made Polo. Or maybe he has had it since his college days and wants to feel young again - or turn on the girls -HA!

Michelle said...

I have memories of that sickly sweet cologne by Jean-Paul Gaultier that I had to pretend to like because the guy I was dating ADORED it. No wonder it didn't work--blech.

Scent is supposed to be the strongest stimulus for memories. When I was studying for Anatomy and Physiology, I wore Aveda Brilliance, and during the test, a quick whiff of my wrist would usually get me the right answer! I bet if I put some on right now I would start rattling off facts about the cranial nerves, hidden in the dark recesses of my mind.

SeaWorthy said...

you know you really wanted that guy, martha..thats why he is in your blog. he he he he

Beth said...

Ugh...Polo... Back in the 80s I had a boss who used to drench himself in it. (What is it about Polo that it can't be used with a light touch?)

I remember going in his office to find a file when he was out on vacation, and suddenly realizing that the office reeked of it even when he wasn't there. Must've been totally saturated. Bleckk...

Anonymous said...

Oh my goodness. Reading this post and the comments have been the most enjoyable part of the day.

Whaddya think that guy (long hair... black shirt...) by the doorway smells like? Hmmmmmm. Weed?

LOL

SeaWorthy said...

Sarah,
It looks like he still has the pipe in his hand, he just got it back from Bush....hahahahaha!!!!!

This has been a good post Marth-a
crackd me up -fer sure!

Bristol said...

Martha- Oh my that is crackin me up!!! I smell it like it was yesterday. I was a freshman in college. And that was the cologne of choice~ I actually smelled it the other and thought, what. And did you wear lauren?
Bristol

Michelle said...

I cannot agree with you more.

Cutzi said...

I like Michelle because she uses Aveda.

I actually can't remember what Polo smells like - and from the sounds of it I think I'll keep it that way.

the tattered nest said...

reminds me of a brother in law that wore waaaaaaaaaaaay to much of it! these comments were to funny...and then Lisa brings up Love's baby soft! now that one has some memories...I hadn't thought of in years!

Martha said...

Oh Miss Coastal Nest??

Waaaaayyyy back in the day I would've gone for the curly-haired goof BEHIND the politican. Because he looks funny - in a good-sense-of-humor way. But he would've blown me off and the Politician would've been all over me. Because I was a loser magnet. Back in the day.

But now I've got my Zuddy.

And Bristol? You KNOW I wore Lauren, girl! And White Linen.

Scents are such a memory-maker for people, aren't they?

And while MJ didn't like Drakkar? I loved it. Still do. Kind of how Linda and Honey Bunch feel about Polo.

Anonymous said...

NOOOO WAAAAY. I DID'NT KNOW YOU LIKE DRAKKAR... WELL, I'VE GOT A WAY TO WRECK IT FOR YOU. LATE TEENS I HAD A GIRLFRIEND- CAN'T QUITE RECALL HER NAME- BUT WE DATED FOR YEARS. EVERY B-DAY I WOULD GO TO DAYTONS (WHERE SHE WORKED) AND SHE'D USE HER DISCOUNT TO GET ME MY BOTTLE 'O DRAKKAR. YEA! THE LONG HAIR; THE LEATHER PANTS; THE BASS GUTAR! DRAKKAR ROCK STAR!

Anonymous said...

My husband doesn't wear it anymore but whenever (not often anymore) I smell it, it brings back great college memories for me of young love. Stale beer and worse smells bring back memories of college drinking parties but not Polo.
Laurie

Laurie Anne said...

Too funny. When I smell Polo, I too am transported back to the
80's but in a good way. Parking and listening to General Public are my Polo memories. Ahhh, good times :0)

sle said...

It's all about MODERATATION! I work for RL and a little POLO can be a good thing!